Check this strange beverage that falls out from the sky. Rain. In February. In Colorado. I just heard thunder. The gods are probably trying to get me for yesterday’s Foaming Rant.
The sky is crying
Month: February 2011
I’m shocked, shocked …
… to learn that there was a clenbuterol ring operating in Spain. Y’think they had a deli op’ running on the side? Specialty meats, that sort of thing?
• Late update: From such tiny acorns springs the mighty oak. I turned that pair of sentences into a mild rant at VeloNews.com. Think of it as rantish. Rantesque? Rant lite?
• Even later update: Somehow I overlooked this very good column from Paul Krugman. Thanks and a tip of the Mad Dog’s Very Serious Hat to Sandy Underpants at The Aristocrats.
A mighty wind
Egad. Picked the wrong steed for the deed in yesterday’s winds. Here’s a Handy Household Hint: Leave the Steelman with the deep-dish Cane Creek Crono Cross wheels in the garage on blustery Wednesday afternoons. I didn’t and damn’ near got blown off the road, and what a road — the Academy Boulevard overpass atop I-25, between the AFA’s south gate and Kelly Johnson Boulevard. Hijo, madre.
But at least I wasn’t having to read or write any Big Tex or Albuterol Clenbutador stories. Jesus, what an orgy of hot air. Management informs me that the coverage was a hit with the readership, drawing more eyeballs than a girl fight between Lady Gaga and Oprah. But still, damn.
Today the wind is up once again and my inner fat bastard is telling me to take the day off. Never happen, porky. If nothing else I’ll go roll around in Palmer Park for a while, try to dodge the worst of it and sweat a little gravy.
Relieved, retired and reprehensible
Isn’t the cycling world just full of news lately? First Albuterol Clenbutador scores a get-out-of-suspension-free card and now Big Tex has retired for a second time (just six more retirements and he’ll have the record).
Yesterday being one of my days off, I decided to pay no attention to the former and go for a two-hour road ride on my actual road bike, which I believe is a first for 2011.
Today I shall ignore the latter and do something similar involving a ’cross bike, just ’cause I can. We have a stretch of pretty nice weather going on and I need to remind my inner fat bastard who’s boss around here while I can still squeeze into a jersey and bibs.
Meanwhile, for your entertainment, I present the following:
- House Squeaker John Boehner (R-Tanning Bed) is full of shit.
- House Squeaker John Boehner (R-Tanning Bed) is doubly full of shit.
I think it’s time someone asked Pumpkinhead for his birth certificate, ’cause I’m pretty sure he’s not from this planet.
Beating the meat
Well, Alberto Clenbutador has pulled it off — in Spain, anyway, where the cycling federation has told him that his Tour de France positive for clenbuterol means fuck-all as far as they are concerned. Cyclingnews reports that he’ll get right after it, racing the Tour ao Algarve Feb. 16-20 and the Vuelta Ciclista a la Region de Murcia March 4-6.
Clenbutador and Bjarne “Mr. 60%” Riis must be jacking off over this bit of news. But it’s far from the final word. UCI and WADA are almost certain to go ballistic and appeal to the Court of Arbitration for Sport, where the outcome is far less certain.
What I’d like to know is: Where do the Spanish cycling federation pootbutts buy their pantalones? Dudes are so crooked, they have to screw ’em on every morning.
Mad Blog Media 