We are not on fire here. Far from it, in fact. Twenty-five degrees and windy at the moment, which is why Her Majesty Miss Mia Sopaipilla is curled up in the Winter Palace.
There was an alarming degree of peachy cloud cover to our west this morning, which in my ignorance I will attribute to secondhand smoke from the Los Angeles fires. Holy hell. The pix look like Dresden after (or maybe during) the Allied bombing.
My fellow velo-scribe Zapata Espinoza is among those whose homes went poof (h/t to the lads at my old shop, Bicycle Retailer and Industry News). A GoFundMe has been set up to help Zap and Xakota in their hour of need.
In all our years together Herself and I have never been in the shit. In the vicinity a time or two, but never to the point of grabbing go-bags and critter kennels and beating feet. We know things will never be the same, but we hope they get better.
I don’t know about you folks, but every time a judge wanted to sentence me for something, I had to, like, be in court, an’ shit.
Tell me again about the whole “rule of law” thing. And then show me the tab for treating Nazi Jesus like he was some senile old fool who just “forgot” that he tried to walk out of the store with the whole country in his pocket.
Fuck me. Arlo Guthrie got tossed in the clink and fined $50 for illegally dumping garbage in Stockbridge, Mass. Nazi Jesus took a dump on the entire United States of America and he’ll be cheating on the front nine before noon Florida time.
And come Jan. 20, he’ll take his act on the road, to the White House.
Just another day at Alice’s Restaurant for this guy. He can get anything he wants. Excepting Alice.
Every minute I stay in this room, I get weaker, and every minute snow falls on that bush, it gets stronger
“Snow, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of snow in the morning. The smell, you know that snow smell? The whole hill. Smelled like … winter.”
We seem to be missing a 6 here. Nevertheless, get your kicks, etc.
Another Jan. 6 has come and gone.
This time we managed to skip the armed-insurrection part of the program, so yay for us. Turns out that when they win, The System works.
Who knew?
Watching Vice President Kamala Harris preside over the certification of the 2024 election results this week sent me careening down Memory Lane, revisiting a night in the sneezer in 1977, a Louis C.K. dramedy from 2016, and the last three pestilential erections.
Somehow the Joker, Billy Joe Shaver, The Cars, Dana Carvey, Willie Nelson, and Bill Clinton snuck in there too.
Once you have a cast of characters like that assembled, for good or ill, you just know it’s time for — yes, yes, yes — the first episode of Radio Free Dogpatch in The Year of Our Lard 2025, Dog help us all.
Additional music not included, but which should replace “Hail to the Chief” for at least the next four years, is “Catch Us If You Can” by the Dave Clark Five.
Mad Blog Media 