Well, the bad news is that the DOGEbags are on the verge of learning — well, basically, everything about U.S. individuals and corporations — with the goal of making Elon Musk and his billionaire buccaneers even richer than they already are.
The good news is that asteroid 2024 YR4 may blow us all to smithereens, rich and poor alike, when it arrives around Christmas 2032.
Might I suggest that Skippy the Dipshit pull his snout out of our butts for a moment to commandeer Thor’s hammer from Marvel Studios, zip up to 2024 YR4 in an armored Cybertruck Starship, and swat the pesky rock into the heart of the Klingon Empire?
Of course, Cap’n Skippy might not pack quite a wallop once he’s off-planet, where money is just so many pictures of dead presidents, most of whom were not drooling, raving embarrassments. But at least it would keep his sticky little fingers out of our pockets for a while.
The FreeDummies have finally turned their beady little eyes to the Land of Enchantment.
According to Alaina Mencinger at The New Mexican, Los Alamos National Laboratory has been “suspending programs related to diversity, equity and inclusion and climate change and scrubbing old issues of the lab’s magazine that discuss these now-disfavored topics.”
LANL employees are federal contractors, not federal employees. Nevertheless, a review has determined that at least two of Dear Leader’s edicts apply to the lab’s DEI and affirmative-action programs, “and the lab is ending such programs as a result,” Mencinger writes.
The New Mexican apparently got its hands on some internal communications — a memo signed by lab director Thom Mason went out Thursday — and bits of this, that, and the other have already begun slip-sliding away down the old memory hole, among them issues of LANL’s National Security Science magazine, focused on anything and everything from climate to diversity, nuclear deterrence to manufacturing.
And it’s not just magazines getting fed into the shredder. According to Mason, LANL has “received guidance” to suspend climate action, sustainability and carbon-neutral energy programs. It goes without saying that LANL is also removing “relevant terminology” from external communications.
But, good news, comrades! “The removal of some content isn’t permanent,” according to the Ministry for Sit the Fuck Down and Shut the Fuck Up.
“To comply with recent direction from the Presidential administration, parts of our website are temporarily unavailable while they’re under construction. We appreciate your patience as we work to update and repost them. … You may notice changes to our website while we reconstruct pages and evaluate language.”
Huh. “Construction” and “update” are not the words I would have chosen for this odious project. As for “evaluating language,” I’d be inclined to leave that sort of thing to the smarties, who are very much not in evidence as the Stalinization of the federal government continues.
You think we’re shipping the wrong people to Guantanamo?
I’m old enough to remember a time when, if some civilian loudmouth waltzed through your front door barking orders, you could kick him in the plums, give him the old heave and also the ho, and get back to whatever it was you were doing before all the bad noise started.
Yet somehow, in the Year of Our Lard 2025, we’ve allowed this porcelain pissant from South Africa to start rearranging the national furniture, to say nothing of the org chart, without so much as a “Just who the hell elected you to anything, anyway, Fisheyes?”
Raise a ruckus and you get frog-marched out the door, either to the breadline or maybe a gated beachfront community that doesn’t feature in Beelzebozo’s plans for the tourist trade. Meanwhile, our media watchdogs just keep licking their own nuts; chasing random brain farts down countless odiferous ratholes; and “fact-checking” the arsonists who are burning down the government faster and more thoroughly than the Brits did during the War of 1812.
But be of good cheer: There’s plenty of bark and bite to be had in the latest edition of Radio Free Dogpatch!
Mad Blog Media 