Category: Stupidity

The path of most resistance

~ Patrick O'Grady ~ 47 Comments
The streets are safer, even with a light coating of leaves.
The streets are safer, even with a light coating of leaves.

If you ever wonder why so many Americans have so much trouble making their government function, just watch them making a shambles of another shared space — the infinitely simpler bike path.

I nearly got crashed twice yesterday — first by a pair of knucklehead roadies in team kit who cut across my bow in Goose Gossage Park, exiting the bike path for the street without bothering to check for oncoming traffic, and a few minutes later by some helmetless dipshit on a beater road bike careening down the wrong side of a sketchy slope coated with sand and pea gravel.

Mind you, these incidents constituted the cherries atop a turd-cake that included the usual ingredients — oblivious strollers three abreast, untrained dogs sans leash, and fleawits wandering across the path without checking to see whether they might be about to violate the laws of physics by trying to occupy the same space at the same time as a 180-pound Irish-American on a 30-pound touring bike traveling at 15 mph.

The offenders invariably wear the blank, bovine gaze of a feedlot cow doomed to wear a soggy bun, a slice of pickle and some processed cheese “food” in the afterlife. And yet some of us we marvel at the popularity of Rupert Murdoch’s various entertainment outlets, which shove a similarly toxic product at the feeble-minded through the flat-panel windows in their living rooms.

How hard can it be to walk, run and ride to the right, pass left, and keep your fucking eyes open?

‘Take some more tea,’ the March Hare said

~ Patrick O'Grady ~ 33 Comments
`I didn't know it was YOUR table,' said Alice; `it's laid for a great many more than three.'
`I didn’t know it was YOUR table,’ said Alice; `it’s laid for a great many more than three.’

Alas, The Beast is back in business in Washington, D.C. Lord, how the Constitutionalists’ comments must be a-flyin’ over at The Gazette‘s website. Repeat after me: Don’t read the comments; don’t read the comments; don’t read the comments.

The Teabillies’ tantrum cost the nation billions — there’s that Big Gummint hand in your pocket again, but this time it’s wearing a Louie Gohmert Decoder Ring — and based on the early returns, it taught them exactly fuck-all.

“There’s an old adage: There’s nothing to be learned from the second kick of a mule,” mused Sen. Bob Corker (R-Tenn.), shortly after voting in favor of the package. “Maybe there’s been a little bit of education—we’ll see.”

Oh, and for any Coloradans idled by the feddle-gummint shutdown, only Doug Lamborn (R-Lipton) voted to keep it going. Feel free to ask him why.

The Baboon Caucus displays its hindquarters

~ Patrick O'Grady ~ 18 Comments
The Baboon Caucus: They always have a case of the red ass.
The Baboon Caucus: They always have a case of the red ass.

Good God, these Tea Bagger twats in the Baboon Caucus are a shameless cluster of fucks.

One minute the feddle gummint is Gigantor, Terror of Civilization, the next it’s a bunny hutch full of fluffy cottontails.

Quoth The New York Times, discussing the House Repugs’ sudden change of heart as they scramble to find a hole through which to scamper in the Shutdown Shithouse they’ve constructed:

Programs that conservatives had tolerated at best were suddenly lavished with praise: nutrition assistance for women and children, federal medical research, national parks, the Smithsonian Institution, even the government of the District of Columbia, which was authorized to spend money to pick up Washington’s trash, maintain its needle exchange program for intravenous drug users and even implement the health care law.

Said Rep. Gerald E. Connolly (D-Va.): “This has been an Orwellian week in which white is black and black is white.”

As long as you don’t look at the Baboon Caucus’s hindquarters, that is. Still flaming red, and that will never change, no matter what they say.