Arise, ye prisoners

~ Patrick O'Grady
Two, four, six, eight, organize to smash the State!
Two, four, six, eight, organize to smash the State!

It’s May Day, kiddies, and I want to see each and every one of you out in the streets today, smashing the State.

Alas, I will not be able to participate as I have a bad back (solidarity, brothers). Also, I have to work. Damn The Man! But if it weren’t for me nobody would know that Jacob Keough (UnitedHealthcare-Maxxis) and Theresa Cliff-Ryan (Colavita-Baci) won last night’s Spartanburg Downtown Criterium. It is a weighty responsibility indeed, yet it is a burden I bear gladly, because booze, food and bike parts cost money and this is how I get some. You’re welcome.

Meanwhile, it’s just above freezing outside and I fear for my tulips. Also my cycling. Our local cage-liner anticipates a soggy, snowy May, so those of you planning to tackle the Iron Horse on Memorial Day weekend better do your training in a meat locker somewhere so you can get used to the feeling of freezing your tits off during a pointless exercise in oxygen deprivation, pain management and altitude sickness.

Me, I’ll be sitting right here, posting a story about it. You’re welcome.

10 thoughts on “Arise, ye prisoners”

  1. No work here unless you count hobknobbing with our Italian neighbors at their street festival. The party started last evening and I was invited down to share some vino and snacks. I brought a bottle to add to the program though we didn’t open it before things wound down. Not to worry though, they gave me back my bottle and another of bubbly to chill down for tonight’s party. So I’m supposed to be down there around 7 pm to enjoy more partying. Hey, it’s a tough life but someone has to live it! All this after a nice ride of 50 kms (doesn’t sound like much but included 2800 feet of elevation gain) followed by an outdoor lunch in town. Pasta carbonara started us, then it was grilled scamorza and radicchio for me while Heather enjoyed a grilled steak — as we smelled so many BBQ’s on the ride we were craving some grilled critter. A Negroamaro wine went very well with the whole meal. Nap time is next on the agenda, gotta get ready for more partying!

  3. Yeah, that was coming for a while, Bruce. The fat cats who own Cannondale figured out some time ago that they could line their pockets a little more deeply if they fired the people who actually build the bikes and outsource that work to the Usual Suspects. Maybe Tom Kellogg can hire a few of them over at his gig near Trexlertown.

    Sad to see another domestic manufacturer turn the knife in the work force’s back. I’ve been riding Cannonballs since they built the first Black Boneshaker in the eighties, but think I’ll shop around next time for someone who still puts some of those dead presidents in American craftsman hands.

    Happy May Day, comrades, at any rate.

  4. Fame, booze, food, and bike parts. Hmmmm … you know, if I had all of the booze, food, and bike parts I needed, I wouldn’t need the fame, now would I?

    ~ David St Hubbins, considering life if he had chosen journo instead of heavy metal.

  6. I see that Dorel owns several bike brands (Cannonball, GT, Mongoose, Schwinn).

    First day of May and its friggin’ snowing down here.

  7. A cartoon sporting a banner with the words: “30 Hour Week” from the master of carping about having “to” work is a classic piece of either propaganda or irony. I’m not sure which one….

    Happy Day After Queen’s Day nevertheless!

  10. Cannondale is dead to me – and I have 4 or actually 5 of them in my garage! Not only for what they just did, but since Dorel took over the bikes are Pieces of Sh*tola. My $5000 Scalpel broke on the seat tube, right at the braze-on for the bottle – and they wouldn’t give me a new one. So I threw an old seat post down as a shim, had a friend weld up a thingie for the exterior, and so far so good. Good riddnace, and I wouldn’t buy any other of their brands either.

    Not that, you know, Specialized is built here…

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