Champs and chumps

We have clouds early, but it looks like another hot one in the Duke City. And in Paris, too? Stay tuned.

We have clouds early, but it looks like another hot one in the Duke City. And in Paris, too? Stay tuned.

The sun rises on the final day of the 2016 Tour de France. Yay, etc.

It wasn’t much of a Tour, from a GC point of view. Sky — for whatever reason — is just too damn strong. And while Zoom-Zoom Froome pulled a few new rabbits out of his hat early on, after a couple of frights he settled down into his usual act, and that, as they say, was that.

A couple of Frenchmen proved fun to watch — Romain Bardet (AG2R) and Julian Alaphillippe (Etixx-QuickStep) — and of course there was Peter Sagan (Tinkoff), who is a race unto himself.

But Fabio Aru (Astana) and Nairo Quintana (Movistar) failed to mount serious challenges. Quintana may have been suffering from allergies, while Aru may have been afflicted with too many Vincenzo Nibalis. Richie Porte (BMC) had that mishap early on, and Tejay van Garderen had the usual meltdown; if he’s gonna keep fading like a cheap paintjob he should really spare us the breezy pre-Tour chatter about how Sky might buckle under pressure and how Froome is beatable. Not by you he ain’t, Sparky.

Sprinters who weren’t named Mark Cavendish (Dimension Data) didn’t have much to celebrate this year, either. He won’t be banging bars on the Champs-Élysées this evening, and whoever wins the final stage will go home wondering whether things might have turned out differently if the Manxman had made it all the way to Paris.

Meanwhile, that other race — the one for the U.S. presidency — is a long way from the finish line, and I’m having trouble getting excited about pulling on my pistachio slingshot and fright wig, lighting a flare, and running alongside the field. Y’suppose we could ask the Badger to push ’em both off the stage?


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8 Responses to “Champs and chumps”

  1. Libby Says:

    You have the title, “Champs and Chumps”, now write the long feature story or book treatment. You draw the art for ‘decorations’ and then, the cover. Foaming rants, bemused detachment and everything in between, you’ve got the chops for a Philistine’s take on the TdF. Perfect for ‘Esquire’ or go all Condè Nast-y with ‘Vanity Fair’. VF gets a lot of mileage out of stories. A book deal. You should be on ‘Deadspin’ already. Or is that distasteful?

    First or next, the story of LUGs. Two guys from…once-upon-a-time -Colorado and all over. Journos, cyclists, music lovers, lawyer, cartoonist, cats, dogs, and possole.

    Is this real life? Is this fantasy? Time to watch the peloton ride into Paris.

    • Pat O'Brien Says:

      “So let it be written, so let it be done.”

    • Libby Says:

      To be clear: cycling chumps not politicians and their posses. Chump is too nice for that crew.
      Cyclists can be ‘chump’ed in so many ways. Parcours, equipment, legs, head, bystanders, team, weather, crashes, bystanders, NASCAR, Oleg and so on.

      • Pat O'Brien Says:

        I meant Patrick to take the quote in my comment literally. “So let it (the book) be written….. I did not mean to imply any political connection.

  2. Libby Says:

    Pat, I love the “Ten Commandments” clip! And Yul Brynner is perfect. I didn’t think you were implying a political connection. I re-read my comment and PO’G’s post and thought I wasn’t clear enough in my original response. Maybe I posted in the wrong spot. Now, I’m not even sure/can’t remember where this ‘reply’ is going to slot in! PO’G’s the best!

    • Pat O'Brien Says:

      No worries Libby. Your suggestion about a book was spot on! I wasn’t sure how my “Ten Commandments” clip was taken. Let’s wait and see what Patrick thinks of your idea.

  3. DownhillBill Says:

    POG & friends, I feel better about this campaign now than I ever have. Voted for Bernie in the primary, knowing full well I’d (have to) vote for the Hildebeast in the general. Whadda ya gonna do? I have no use for oligarchs or oligarchies, but even less for narcissistic blowhard white trash buffoons.

    Saw a crowd near the Kaine’s house when I came home from the store last night and walked down to join them; they were waiting for Tim & Anne to get home from the VP announcement. Couple hundred+ neighbors in an unplanned & unannounced rally. Tim & Anne made off the cuff short speeches when they arrived, and I was very impressed by their positive attitude toward HC.

    The Kaine’s are the real deal. Committed, intelligent, socially conscious overachievers (they met in Harvard Law) with a record of results. Everyone in the neighborhood has known them for years, and no one* I’ve _ever_ talked to perceives an iota of insincerity in either of them. Sounds too good to be true, I know. It’s not. Yeah Tim could be even more liberal on some things, but he listens to reason, can be persuaded, and can work across the isle insofar as that’s possible nowadays.

    When their kids were growing they even had the only tire swing in the neighborhood – in their front yard.

    There is hope.

    *Out-of-the-neighborhood tea baggers excepted, of course.

  4. Vuelta de Bosque | Mad Blog Media Says:

    […] not feeling that old smash-the-State love from The Hilldebeast, though Comrade Downhill Bill speaks highly of her running mate in comments. Comrade Pierce approves, too, albeit with […]

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