Pup fiction

Anxiety dreams last night: I was walking the earth, like Caine in “Kung Fu,” hoofing it from place to place, meeting people, and getting in adventures.

And everywhere I went nobody was wearing a mask.

I was outraged, weaving through the shambling hordes of brain-dead booger-bags as though they were zombie cowboys bent on nativist misbehavior, until I realized that I was likewise unmasked, with my ugly mug hanging out in the wind.

No doubt any competent brain mechanic could make sense of this. I’m guessing it means that deep down I think we’re all in the shit together. Just another kernel panic in MeatWorld™.

Probably didn’t help that I saw a bunch of maskless wanderers on my bike ride yesterday. Or that the guv’nah gave New Mexicans another dressing-down for spreading El Buggo® like honey on a sopaipilla. We are not yet in the actual shit, she sez to us she sez, but we are certainly circling the bowl.

I’m doing my part, boss. Staying home except for grocery shopping and exercise. Washing my paws. And wearing my mask.

Whenever I’m awake, that is. Who doesn’t dream about not wearing a mask?

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7 Responses to “Pup fiction”

  1. khal spencer Says:

    Even wearing it while taking a dump in the privacy of your own Reading Room(tm)?

  2. khal spencer Says:

    I had a weird dream too last night. Must be going around. Dreamed I was in a submarine in shallow water, suddenly surrounded by the whole Japanese Navy and dozens of enemy subs. The dream morphed into me holding a little submarine and trying to push it through this sea of other subs, and under a battleship in a port. Thankfully, I woke up before any of those ships noticed my arm and hand holding the sub.

    I imagine that is all some sort of metaphor for all these maskless people surrounding us and being the source of potential Bug Attacks.

    Or something.

  3. Pat O’Brien Says:

    I dreamed that I was sleeping on a train on the way to San Antonio. Post COVID-19 of course. Always wanted to take an overnight train trip, and when this shit is over, we gonna do it.

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      Onliest time I was ever on a train was during a family vacation trip from San Antonio to Mexico City and Acapulco. I seem to recall taking the train over the Rio, and at some point air travel was involved, as was a spectacular case of the turista that required medical attention for Your Humble Narrator.

      Man, did I ever know how to ruin a summer vacation. That was even better than the time I gave the old man the mumps in Oklahoma City, en route from San Antone to Sioux City, Iowa.

  4. carl duellman Says:

    Simone: Do you have any dreams?
    Pee-Wee Herman: Yeah, I’m all alone. I’m rolling a big doughnut and this snake wearing a vest…

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