Work song

We almost skipped Sleepy Joe’s address to Congress Lite last night.

Our “Northern Exposure” DVD collection has been getting a workout — you’d be surprised how well that series holds up after 30 years — and I already had a pretty good idea of how “The Joe Show” was gonna go. I’ve seen that one before, too.

But we watched ol’ Joe spin his tale, and I’m glad we did.

It was light on chest-thumping and finger-pointing. It felt less like theater and more like a routine business meeting.

“We all know the drill here, ladies and gents. The Old Home Place is in a helluva state. But we can fix it, if we all pitch in and get our hands dirty, and here’s where I think we should start.” Etc.

I particularly liked his attempt to take back “We the people” from the knuckleheads. I’ve said this for years. We are the government. “L’etat, c’est nous.” If it’s a trainwreck, well, we let it go off the rails, didn’t we? Sat there and watched and pitched a bitch because nobody gave us free marshmallows to toast in the subsequent three-alarm fire.

So here comes Sleepy Joe and he sez to ’em he sez: “Fuck me, what a mess. Let’s put out that fire, get this thing back on the rails, and see where we can go with it. Now I think of it, these rails could use a little work. And is that a road or a gravel quarry? Jesus. Call up the pavers. Whaddaya mean you haven’t got any bars on your phone? Well, shit, add that to the list.

“And quit picking on the kid. Who cares what bathroom s/he uses? We don’t do something about the pipes we’re all gonna be shitting behind the bushes before much longer. And the bushes are gonna be on fire because climate change! Hel-lo! Make another note, Kamala. I’ll bet you wish you hadn’t answered your phone when I called you up and asked you to join the ticket, hey?”

Joe knows he has a teeny-tiny window of opportunity here. From what I’ve read, the Richie Riches and Corporate America don’t mind paying a smidge more in taxes at this moment in history because they know it’s tough to do bidness in a burning building while hanging from the rafters in a stylish suit of tar and feathers and the customers are engaged in running gun battles outside, too broke to pay their bills but not broke enough to pawn their guns.

Too, odds are he loses the House in the midterms thanks to all the three-card Monte that took place at our local carnivals while we were focused on The Big Top. He might be a one-termer whether he likes it or not.

So, yeah. That was quite a laundry list of chores he laid out last night. But he wasn’t a dick about it, and you can’t deny the Old Home Place needs a little work. Deferred maintenance has a way of piling up like turds behind bushes. Or in the House of Representatives.

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8 Responses to “Work song”

  1. khal spencer Says:

    Missed the beginning of his address out of a brain fart of the time zones, but saw a good bunch of it. Was a damn nice job.

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      We thought he did a’ight. Wasn’t trying to style himself as the biggest midget in the room. I enjoyed it for the low volume. After four years of air-raid sirens, car alarms, and dive klaxons, it was something I could listen to with a minimum of “Oh, good luck with that/go fuck yourself” asides.

  2. SAO' Says:

    I totally realize that at this point, I am incapable of giving anyone a fair shake. Too much baggage, been burned too many times. But I wanted to scream 60 seconds into Scott’s response. Dude was a jumble of random GOP talking points, with no coherence or connection to reality. Dude started by blaming Biden for shutting down schools in 2020, which is a nifty time travel operation. If I could go back in time, I’d maybe kill Hitler or buy Apple stock or something, but that’s just me, I guess.

    The modern GOP is a half-trick pony that has hit an infinite loop. No shit, I would not be surprised to learn every single one of them was a Google machine learning experiment. Plug in 40 years of bad policy, see what it spits out.

  3. SAO' Says:

    How far are you into NX? I have a box of DVDs somewhere, but both the disks and the disk player are un-unpacked from the last move. At some point I need to venture into the basement and dig them up to revise the classics.

    * Season 4, The Big Feast. Damn near perfect episode. I use the “ten inches of Solingen steel” line about once a week in the kitchen.

    * Season 4, Northern Lights. Gotta use that “more light” soliloquy every Winter Solstice.

    * Season 3, Cicely. 108 year-old Ned Svenborg comes to town.

    * Season 3, Our Wedding. Another great Chris-in-the-Morning speech.

    Season 5, First Snow. Say hello to the flakes, everyone!

    Also, anything with Adam Arkin. And the two with Bill Irwin, just because Bill Irwin is a national treasure.

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      We’re into season three — just watched “Oy, Wilderness.” Joel and Maggie deal with a downed plane in the wilderness and a little too much togetherness. The reversal of the traditional male-female roles in that one, which get flipped again when Doc Joel performs “heart surgery” on the plane’s engine, is excellent. Adam is one of the highlights of the series, for sure.

      I remain amazed at how well “NX” holds up after all these years. We’ve revisited a few shows whose sell-by date was sometime in the last millennium.

  4. Pat O’Brien Says:

    O’Grady for president! Just 4 years and you and Herself could retire in style. You got the chops and the quick comebacks for this gig. Sandy and I would come and visit. And, think of the concerts you could have at the people’s house. Have the staff as the audience! You da man!

  5. Dale Says:

    “Too, odds are he loses the House in the midterms thanks to all the three-card Monte that took place at our local carnivals while we were focused on The Big Top. He might be a one-termer whether he likes it or not.”

    Very likely to happen because of at least three things. Miake that five or more.
    1. Dems don’t think that electing state reps and senators is important and those seats are more important than the presidency in the long run.
    2. Those state seats allow the Reps to Gerrymander, strip an opposing party governor of power, and now it seems to magic voter fraud out of thin air (see Arizona).
    3. Dems and Reps don’t vote at a sufficient rate in primary elections to exclude nutcases (see Marjorie Taylor Green).
    4. See above. I may be wrong there – she may be just what her district wants.
    5. Dems roll over, Reps attack.
    6. Dems try to use facts and logic – Reps use 4 pounds of beef per year and other facts (?).

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