The Deuce of Clubs is not always a winner


Here’s another strong argument for staying indoors and playing your game of choice under the Fedders window unit.

Some shitbird in a Ford Super Duty drove into the masters 55+ category at the Arizona state road championships this morning in Show Low, Ariz.

According to various media reports the driver took out at least six racers, then fled the scene; the John Laws caught up with him and busted a cap in his ass. Everyone appears to be alive, but hospitalized; four cyclists and the driver are in critical condition, according to the Arizona Republic.

Irony of ironies: The Bike the Bluff race is sponsored by Show Low Ford.

The White Mountain Independent has a photo that will take a few years off the lives of anyone who rides the roads.

Tags: ,

13 Responses to “The Deuce of Clubs is not always a winner”

  1. khal spencer Says:


    I used to ride the race motorcycle escort for the Dick Evans race on Oahu, a 112 mile race around the island which is the unofficial state championship. We always had a big support group of Honolulu P.D. motorcycle cops with us and I got to be one of the gang, so to speak. They really got into supporting us. Probably because we paid the overtime.

    One year near the finish I had stopped my Harley (not my choice, but all I could rent–Maynard Hershon would be disgusted with me) to block a side road as the lead group came around a curve. Some clown in a big car tried to butt into the road just as the peloton approached and he didn’t want to wait. So I blocked him with the H-D and put my boot on his front bumper. He really started getting pissed. Just as that happened one of the Boyz in Blue came around the curve. I waived the cop down. The macho man’s dick suddenly shrunk back into his pants with no further fuss.

    Too many assholes in this country. I’m not sad that this one got a lead enema.

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      The bargain model in the Super Duty series has a curb weight of nearly 6,000 pounds. That will put a serious crease in your Lycra.

      According to the race bible, organizers promised “the safest grand tour style start in Arizona” — a neutral parade along the Deuce of Clubs. The Show Low police were to prove traffic control through town. It’s a stark reminder of the athlete-release language from Back in the Day® — “I acknowledge that cycling is an inherently dangerous sport. …” And not always for the reasons one might expect.

  2. khal spencer Says:

    Further irony: It happened in front of Horne Collision Center.

  3. Pat O’Brien Says:

    I figured you’d be on this story, and you were. Can’t wait to hear the details and excuses on this one, if the driver survives. And the craziness continues in Phoenix. Get hit while riding or shot while driving, take your choice. Plus, we’re cooking in record heat and running out of water, some of us sooner, some a little later.

    “And the news just repeats itself, like some forgotten dream that we’ve both seen”. Hello In There by John Prine

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      Sigh. The blood draw should be informative. Sounds like he was in the fast lane headed in one direction, the race was in the curb lane headed in the other; for reasons unknown he crossed the lines and there you have it.

      That he got sideways with the gendarmes afterward speaks volumes. All due respect to the boys in blue, those dudes are rarely inclined to shoot motorists on our behalf.

      • Pat O’Brien Says:

        The driver must have been packing. More guns less shootings, right Wayne?

        102 at the airport where no one lives; 108 on my back patio with 9% humidity. Seems you folks are cooking too.

      • Patrick O'Grady Says:

        We topped out at 104°, if you believe our weather widget, which I’m starting to doubt.

        I just had a peek at the crime scene via Google Maps’ street view. It’s the usual “stroad,” with two lanes each direction and a center turn lane. This dude really had to make an effort to drive into this race. I suppose a blown front tire or a spilled drink/lit cigar/hooker’s face dropped in the crotch might have sent him astray, but then the cops probably wouldn’t have shot him. He’d be a solid citizen then.

      • khal spencer Says:

        “Officers tried to stop the driver, which “ultimately led to the suspect being shot,” about a mile and a half away, Navajo County Emergency Management and Preparedness said in a statement.”

        • Patrick O'Grady Says:

          The latest NYT story quotes a Santa Fe cyclist, Tony Quinones:

          “I don’t know who the heck this guy is, or what his motive was,” Mr. Quinones said in an interview on Saturday. “But he intentionally did not go left into a parking lot. He drove his truck directly and intentionally into our group, and you could hear him accelerate until he hit that telephone pole.”

  4. SAO' Says:

    // After fleeing the scene of the collision with the bicyclists, the driver of the truck was apparently involved in a shooting near Sylvester Street behind Ace Hardware in Show Low where he crashed the vehicle. //

    That’s some top notch gumshoe work.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: