Earlier this month, when Wirecutter ran a piece headlined “The Best Boxed Macaroni and Cheese,” I knew it was only the first course.
Today, behold the return of (drumroll, please) … Hamburger Helper!
Writing in The New York Times, proprietor of Wirecutter, food-industry reporter Julie Creswell tells us:
While most food companies are seeing declines in consumer demand for their products, sales of Hamburger Helper are up 14.5 percent in the year through August, getting an extra bump from its appearance on an episode of “The Bear” in June, according to the company that owns the brand, Eagle Foods.
And it’s not just because people are nostalgic for the good old Seventies, Creswell observes. Now, as then, the cost of food consumed at home is up considerably — 21 percent from four years ago — and the prices of beef, coffee, and many fruits and vegetables are likewise rising.
Thus Hungry America returns to Bullshit in a Box to keep their guts from greasing their backbones. Here’s Sally Lyons Wyatt, who advises packaged food companies at the research firm Circana:
“Cost-of-living expenses are up. Eating and drinking expenses are up. Consumers are looking for foods that fill them up for the least amount of money.”
More reporting like this, please. Americans may not care whether Stephen Colbert and Jimmy Kimmel still have jobs, but they might get sick of (or from) eating Yellow No. 5 with Extra Sodium three meals a day.
If you’re trying to cut corners as our “leaders” focus on the culture wars rather than cuisine, might I recommend Pierre Franey’s turkey chili? Herself and I can get three or four meals out of that one, spooned atop bowls of rice and sprinkled with crushed corn chips, cilantro, a sharpish cheddar, and a squeeze of lime.
Likewise this simple bolognese from Giada de Laurentiis. We got three servings apiece out of that one this week, over egg noodles, and then spread the remainder on a couple of corn pizza shells from Vicolo. Topped it with grated mozzarella and parmesan with a scattering of crushed red pepper.
But if you simply must have mac and cheese, well, take a whack at Bob Sloan’s recipe from “Dad’s Own Cookbook.”
And then tell the Dick Tater that he can eat shit. Hell, he already does.
Mad Blog Media 
This gets me to thinking about buying me a couple cases of Natural Ice beer. Tastes like shit, but it has 5.9% alcohol by volume. At about 60 cents a can, almost anyone can flush the news poison out of the brain pan on the cheap. I got a 12 pack of that abomination on ice next to my shotgun on the front porch as we speak. Go ahead you commie pinko liberal sumbitches, walk on my lawn!
With respect to the Kraft Mac & Cheese, I noticed the other day that they now tout “No Artificial Dyes”. I was like, “How on Dog’s Gray Earth is that possible given the semi nuclear yellow glow of it? I read the box and sure enough, they are now using turmeric to make it yellow. Amazing
That semi nuclear yellow glow does give it away. Maybe they use a little uranium oxide, aka yellowcake, instead of artificial colors. Get an alpha counter and check?
Don’t like Georgie boy know about the yellowcake. He will put a 500 pounder right in the middle of your kitchen table to eliminate those weapons of mass destruction.
Given what I’ve seen of the price of beef and fish, I’m glad I gave up eating dead animals. Fresh caught ahi was the last to go. It used to be reasonable in Honolulu but at Whole Paycheck, it is quite the pricetag for stuff shipped all the way from half an ocean and half a continent away. A few pounds of beans and rice, embellished with fresh vegetables and spices, and Bob’s your uncle.
I heard that fewer people are getting those meat analogs, e.g., Beyond Beef. We use a bunch of meat analogs masquerading as beef and chicken. It ain’t cheap but I don’t have to worry about some animal living a shit life in a feedlot until someone pops it in the forehead and wraps it in plastic wrap for me. Or for that matter, getting a hunting license again.
Wish more Americans would think about their food more holistically.
Then there is the beef price thing. Cattle producers are making really good money at the moment. One of the few bright spots in ag land. They trimmed herds a number of years ago and are now seeing higher demand and a shorter supply driving up prices. With import tariffs helping to keep supply tight, they’ll be doing well for the next few years. Add to that much cheaper feed costs due to a serious lack of grain exports, feed costs will be low how quite a while.
We get some meats from a family operation in north Indiana. 7 Sons. They ship to us frozen and it’s not cheap but it sure as hell ain’t Tyson or Smithfield. We plan on attending one of their farm to table dinners soon. But as Khal alludes to, meatless is best if you care about groundwater. And with the Fed meat inspection being gutted, expect plenty more contamination crimes ahead. Wild caught fish? A big scam for the most part. Pity that, since I could eat fish until I grew gills.
We eat much less meat than we used to. Hardly any beef (a pound of ground now and then for tacos or bolognese, an amount that’s good for at least three meals apiece). Almost zero pork, even for posole or green chile (we use chicken thighs for those).
Mostly we eat chicken thighs, with turkey second and fish third. And there are meatless meals.
We’re buying mostly from Sprouts, Natural Grocers, and Keller’s, a local grocery. The Foods Hole is right out because Jeffy Bozos thinks The Washington Post is for wiping his ass. And I’m going to look into La Montanita Co-op just ’cause. My man The Weebs does some business there, and Herself dropped by a while back and thought it seemed a’ight. Both locations involve a bit of driving, but hey, a feller needs to get out and see the country if he’s gonna blog about it.
We are life members at La Montanita. Seems like a good place.
Guys look at pork. Still reasonable,
enchiladas for dinner, left over with an egg and salsa for breakfast. Get the slow cooker out for pullec pork sandwiches and tacos with iceberg lettuce and cheese. We used to get ours from neighbors, but they have had a hard time with transportation costs, cheap fuel my ass. Plus, pork butt was turned into posole, and the rest was made into green chile, served with tortillas made from rendered bacon grease and flour. But then beef is way too high, not necessarily the ranchers making huge money, but only four (4) huge conglomerates controlling the marketplace. One of which is a Brazilian outfit. But fuel prices came down on day one ( bullsh&t) and tariffs will cause a calf to go from 30 lbs to 800 lbs in 3 months. The Great blonde dumbass ass and his lackeys can’t change nature but still lie about it. Can only eat so much chicken and turkey. Plus italian sausage and marinara sauce with homemade pasta still tastes good. But seriously, folks, this country is on an ugly downward slide.
Have I mentioned that when I was in Alamosa recently a Martinez cousin said she’d stopped making her own tortillas? She says she goes for the “storetillas” now. Fuckin’ brilliant. I love language almost as much as I love tortillas.
I was happy to eat meat when I killed it myself. Got a very nice Remington 870 and a bolt action 30/06 to do the job. I’m a little less willing when I let other people do the dirty work, and I don’t know quite how dirty that work might be, all at some dumb animal’s expense while making a profit for someone else.
The inter tubes generally suck, but it’s crazy that this article has not suffered from bitrot, brokenlinkitis, or server meltdown.
https://www.latimes.com/food/la-xpm-2010-oct-07-la-fo-sos-macncheese-20101007-story.html
Apparently the key to good macaroni cheese is a Fat Tire based sauce plus $57 worth of cheese.
Kit Carson’s last words:
I wish I had time for one more bowl of chili