Parking it

No, it's not another Bibleburg homeless encampment — it's the Souther Arizona Road Adventurers, camping in the town park in Bisbee, Arizona.
No, it's not another Bibleburg homeless encampment — it's the Southern Arizona Road Adventurers, camping in the town park in Bisbee, Arizona.

Ah, wi-fi. Back to civilization, such as it is. What it is, is Bisbee, Arizona, where we’re enjoying a layover day in the town park. This means the tents get to stay up an extra day, which cuts down on the carnival atmosphere a bit and gives everyone a chance to rest, regroup and reorganize.

After yesterday’s rigors some of us opted for bed-and-breakfasts or hotels rather than spend another night in wind-battered tents, so I poached a little bathroom time from one of them and shaved for the first time since Saturday. I was starting to look like Papa Hemingway, only without all that annoying talent.

Everyone’s hoping for a little less wind — or, even better, a tailwind — when we return to Tombstone tomorrow via a different route. Me, I’m hoping to find some Guinness on tap tonight, St. Patrick’s Day being a holy day among my people (the Drunkards).

But there’s some local ale to be had here, so if the Micks don’t come through, I’m sure there will be alternatives. Last night it was Moose Drool — and yes, it tastes better than it sounds.

Java jive

The very latest in Road Trip Breakfast Technology (circa 2005): a cup of Starbucks and a 12-inch G4 PowerBook.
The very latest in Road Trip Breakfast Technology (circa 2005): a cup of Starbucks and a 12-inch G4 PowerBook.

Comfort zone: A cage just big enough so that when you sit at its center, strangers can’t poke you through the bars with sharp sticks.

Like many of you, I’m a creature of habit. For instance, I must have powerful coffee immediately upon arising in the morning or someone will suffer. I used to haul a small espresso machine around, but in the age of a Starbucks on every street corner this has become unnecessary.

Or so I thought.

This morning I ambled into the motel’s breakfast nook and poured myself a cup of what appeared to be used chain degreaser, only not as tasty. Down the loo it went and out the door I went, cursing and spitting, in search of the velvety black jumper cables of life.

I prefer to deal with locally owned java shops when traveling but there was no time to waste on scientific experimentation. And besides, my motel is near the airport and nothing else. You’d think that where there are travelers there would be grog shops, taverns, alehouses, pubs, cafés, cantinas and yes, coffee shops, but not in South Tucson. Bubba. You want hot asphalt, fast food and faster cars, you’re in the right place. Everything else must be found elsewhere.

Incredibly, the nearest Starbucks was five miles away. A 10-minute drive! And I had to make it without coffee! Oh, the humanity. But I scored — a tall Americano, plus a bagel with cream cheese and a pint of Naked orange juice to stave off the scurvy (yeah, I checked out the motel’s “breakfast” before leaving, too).

Editor’s note: No motel staffers were harmed in the making of this blog post.

Stoned again

Texas Canyon, in Arizona, of all places.
Everything's bigger in Texas, even when it's in Arizona.

I remember being impressed by Texas Canyon when I was 26 and leaving Colorado Springs for a job at The Arizona Daily Star.

Back then I was piloting a 1973 Datsun pickup that contained my entire life, including a motley mutt name of Jojo who followed me everywhere like a debt collector.

This time around I was 55 and herding a 2005 Subaru Forester full of bike crap, camping gear and journalism tools, and the only dog in the hunt was me.

But it’s still an impressive sight. Looks like God had a few rocks left over and decided to store them here.

In The Old Pueblo

El Minuto — a Tucson fixture since 1939 and a fave of mine since 1980.
El Minuto — a Tucson fixture since 1939 and a fave of mine since 1980.

My combo-plate tour of the Southwest continues with a visit to El Minuto in Tucson. I first ate there back in 1980, and whenever I’m back in town it’s the first place I stop.

The food isn’t like the fiery grub you get in northern New Mexico — it’s more like the Tex-Mex that hooked me as a kid in San Antone. The mild red sauce has a tomato tang, I’m pretty sure the tacos have some potato in ’em (I always gobble them down too quickly to be sure), and the beans are refried instead of whole. Good stuff all around, and smack dab between La Choza and El Sombrero in terms of price point.

The drive west was uneventful. Giant vehicles remain all the rage in this part of the nation, whether people need them or not, and Texicans with regard for neither law nor order owned the left lane from Las Cruces all the way to Tucson, roaring past the rest of us like Soviet apparatchiks passing proles in the Moscow Zil lanes. They gave no quarter, and even Californicators moved over to let them pass.

While dodging the sons of the Lone Star State I enjoyed periodic bursts of philosophy from the New Mexico Department of Transportation: “Dust storms may exist.” Ah, but then again they may not. And they didn’t.

The Suburu’s thermometer flirted with 60 but never quite closed the deal until I crossed into Arizona around 1. It’s 69 and sunny now, and doesn’t that feel good to this ghostly pale gabacho. I won’t be wearing three jerseys while riding around these parts. But I will be wearing a shitload of sunscreen.

• Late update: After getting settled at the hotel I thought about driving back into Tucson proper for a pint or two at Gentle Ben’s Brewing Company, but I wasn’t in the mood to deal with the traffic, which is slightly insane. Instead I picked up a sixer of another local microbrew, the IPA from Nimbus Brewing Company. Drinkable, but not spectacular; last night’s pints at High Desert were much livelier. In other news, tomorrow morning’s update may be the last on this site for a couple of days — I don’t believe I’ll have wi-fi again until Tombstone. So keep an eye on maddogmedia.wordpress.com for the latest in vertical gain and pain management.

• Later update: How could I forget? Today is not only Herself’s birthday, it’s Jack Kerouac’s birthday. An auspicious day to be on the road. Herself was treated to a pleasant dinner at The Blue Star by our mutual friends Steve and Doris, but Jack got jack shit ’cause he’s all like dead and stuff.

Lord, I’m southbound

I-25 in New Mexico.
I always like those stretches of highway that look like launching pads.

The road goes ever on and on, as Bilbo sang. This one is Interstate 25 in New Mexico, and if you’re riding with me it goes south with stops at Frank and Lupe’s El Sombrero in Socorro and the High Desert Brewing Company in Las Cruces.

You will recall that Bilbo and the gang rarely let a good road trip interfere with eating and drinking. Ponies being smarter than Subarus, I saved my drinking for the end of the day’s travels.