Posts Tagged ‘Chinese spy balloon’

There and back again

February 15, 2023

Hm. We’re gonna need a bigger coffee cup.

I don’t think we’ve had a snowfall of any consequence this winter. Of course, now that I’ve said that, we’ll get hammered, probably tonight. — Your Humble Narrator, yesterday

Ho, ho, etc. I’m rarely right, but when I’m right, I’m right. Right?

I tumbled out of bed at stupid-thirty this morning to see if I needed to clear our black-diamond driveway for Herself, and glad I was of it, too, because I had to clear the sonofabitch twice.

The first go-round I broomed about an inch and a half of not-insubstantial snow off our slippery slope. When I turned around at the bottom to inspect my work I could see that the rematch had already been scheduled.

So after coffee and toast I had another go at it. Call it three inches of snow all told, which ain’t too shabby for these parched parts.

Once I was finished the lab fired off a message saying nobody needed to come to work until 10. Because of course they did.

I guess it takes a while to fire up the orbital space lasers Sandia uses to clear The Duck! City’s streets, what with all the batteries being earmarked for electric Hummers and whatnot.

Either that or they’re all tasked with vaporizing Chinese spy balloons.

Say, maybe that’s not snow. Maybe it’s vaporized Chinese spy balloon. Does that crap melt or just hang around being a pain in the ass, like George Santos?

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Posted in Snow, The Duck! City | 21 Comments »

Fire and ice

February 14, 2023

Free water for the trees. ’Ray!

“It’s a winter wonderland out there!” Herself exclaimed last night.

“No way,” I replied. Last I’d looked, just minutes earlier, it was raining.

“Totally,” she said.

So I looked again, and as usual, she was right. Coming down like Chinese balloons it was.

The forecast has been something of a combo platter for the past few days, as the weather wizards try to cover all the bases (rain, snow, sleet, wind, plague of toads, bloody stones, UFOs, zombie apocalypse, etc.).

With this in mind I availed myself of a pleasant 90-minute ride on Stupor Sunday (48° and sunny). Then yesterday Herself and I enjoyed a short trail run (54° and sunny with a stiff wind out of the SSW).

That breeze — Yahweh’s postal service — was apparently what delivered three of the predictors’ prognostications more or less at once last evening: wind, rain, and snow.

I never know what’s going to be in these packages once I unwrap them — big box of nothin’ or visit to the chiropractor — so I got up way too early this morning and had another look-see.

Oh, goody. About an inch and a half of feathery fluff, but still some moisture to it. Good for the trees.

I broomed the driveway clear for Herself’s launch to the lab and skedaddled back indoors, where the coffee would be once I got around to making some. First things first, as the fella says. If I let any kind of snow sit on that north-facing black-diamond driveway of ours on Valentine’s Day it will stay there until St. Patrick’s Day. Maybe Easter.

And now, we get right back on that meteorological roller coaster (rain, snow, sleet, wind, plague of toads, bloody stones, UFOs, zombie apocalypse, etc.). Also, keep a weather eye out for smoke blowing up your ass.

Naw, it’s not another controlled burn gone sideways. Just Nikki Haley’s presidential campaign. I’m not hearing any fire alarms.

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Posted in Casual snark, Deep political thought, Snow | 17 Comments »

I’m tired

February 4, 2023

“Vhy don’t you admit it? He’s too much of a man for you. I know! You’re going to need an army to beat him! You’re finished. Fertig! Verfallen! Verlumpt! Verblunget! Verkackt!”

“Joe’s not quick on the draw!
“Won’t lay down the law!”
The GOP croons

But as the Chinese keep spyin’
Joe sends jets a-flyin’
And busts their balloon.

-pop-

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Posted in Casual snark, Movies | 17 Comments »