Friends of the Blog Pat O. and Khal S. have expressed a desire to pedal around the Duke City for a couple of days, and thus we shall.

The inaugural Ruta del Rancho Pendejo shall be June 2-3, with two stages, one on road and the other off. Which comes first? Chicken or egg? Weather, the gods and other actors beyond our control shall dictate the schedule.

Likewise the routes. The road stage will probably cover the Paseo del Bosque (from the Alameda Open Space trailhead south and back again), but additional trails will be on tap (Paseo del Norte, North Diversion Channel Trail) should the spirit be willing.

The bosque trail is as flat as flat can be, so any old road/cyclocross bike will do, but we may find ourselves climbing The Invisible Hill (the New Mexican wind is renowned for its ability to adjust so that it is always in your grille). Also, and too, traffic is heavy on weekends, so gird your loins for other cyclists, joggers, skaters, dog-walkers, stroller-pushers and other impediments to forward progress.

There’s also the option of climbing Tramway east of Interstate 25, a pleasant half-hour grind with soothing views of the Sandias. You gain about a thousand feet from the Rio Grande to the intersection of Tramway Boulevard and Tramway Road (which in itself is a nice little climb to the Sandia Tram proper). Masochists who find us feeble taskmasters may sample the climb to the Sandia Crest.

The off-road stage is likely to take in the trails surrounding the Elena Gallegos picnic area, and perhaps those to the south of Menaul Boulevard as well. The clinically insane ride these on cyclocross bikes, touring bikes, and even single-ring, flat-bar, canti-braked townies with a low end of 38×28, but we will not laugh at anyone who prefers an actual, y’know, like, mountain bike, an’ shit. Well, not much, anyway, and certainly not where you can catch us doing it.

The Ruta is an extremely casual, social weekend of gentle riding open to all Friends of the Blog. I recommend seeking lodging somewhere in the ABQ Uptown area (Interstate 40 and Louisiana). Over the years Herself and I have camped at the Hilton Garden Inn, the Homewood Suites, and the Hampton Inn (Carlisle and I-40) and come away with our throats uncut, our guts unshot, and all our possessions in hand.

Sustenance is a work in progress at the moment. You’ll be on your own for breakfast, but depending upon turnout evening meals will probably be at one of the justly heralded green-chile beaneries in the North Valley, a 20-minute drive from El Rancho Pendejo and ABQ Uptown.

Post-ride refreshments may be available on the patio at El Rancho Pendejo, where your hosts will include Your Humble Narrator, Herself, Field Marshal Turkish von Turkenstein (commander, 1st Feline Home Defense Regiment) and his adjutant, Miss Mia Sopaipilla.

Sound like your idea of a good time? Holler at me by May 1 — ogrady (at) maddogmedia (dot) com — so I can gauge the size of the peloton.