The last few drops of toilet humor

Mark Cavendish got beat by half a wheel today, and you know what that means. Earplugs for everyone within 4km of the Omega Pharma team bus.

Still, as the man said … it’s better to be pissed off than to be pissed on.

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17 Responses to “The last few drops of toilet humor”

  1. John Says:

    Oh, PO’G, you left out the best part: Mark Cavendish didn’t just get beat, he got PASSED in the last 100 meters! He was sprung with sight of the line, he launched his “missile” (that was a reference to his nickname, not a euphemism), and Kittel came off his wheel and rode around Cavendish. Kittel’s missile was faster (again, not a euphemism). I literally can’t recall ever having seen him get passed so close to the line, and I have to admit that I enjoyed it.

    But yea, new rule at the TdF: same time for anyone who crashes within hearing distance of Cavenish’s tempter tantrum. That’ll push it out a few more kilometers, and maybe all the way to the intermediate sprint line today.

  2. khal spencer Says:

    Since we are on Off Color Humor Week, its also better that Kittel came off his wheel than came on his wheel…

  3. Larry T. Says:

    How boring has Le Beeg Shew 2013 become when all the talk is about someone getting pissed off about being pissed on?

    • John Says:

      You are so right, Larry. It’s times like these I’m glad I’m not a cycling journalist trying in vain to make this tour something more than a snooze-fest.

      On the other hand, I’ve been getting in some morning rides and I feel well rested, which is unusual for July. Except last year.

      • khal spencer Says:

        The mountain stages are this weekend. I’ll do my normal suffer-fest in the mountains and watch the re-runs on TV later in the day if it sounds interesting. These flat stages seem so irrelevant.

      • John Says:

        I did that last the other day, Khal. Instead of watching the cool part of the day drift by, I got on my bike and rode the Monument intent on watching that day’s stage later in the day. Everything was going fine, I had a great ride and everything, until before watching the stage I foolishly went over to Facebook to update a road cycling advocacy/local information page I help manage (yes, Facebook can be used for actual information). And what do I accidentally see there? A post by a bicycle component making proudly proclaiming their “victory” in the Tour with, worst of all, a picture of that day’s winner.

        The lesson here is don’t go to any web site, don’t talk to anyone, don’t even read your mail marked “past due”, but watch the race right away before someone can ruin for you. Not like there’s much suspense left in this year’s edition anyway.

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      The yellow seems a foregone conclusion, unless Zoom-Zoom loses a few more teammates (Eddy Van Hagen laid down his gee-tar today). Likewise the green, unless Cav’ crashes Sagan out. But there are still moments. Just not many of them.

      If Zoom-Zoom crushes in the mountains, it will be like mainlining Valium, Tour-wise.

      • Patrick O'Brien Says:

        “Eddie Van Hagen laid down his gee-tar today.” Ha! Now I know why they pay you the big money. That is some funny stuff right there.
        Quintana-Costa will cause mucho problema for Sky in the mountains. How could he not with a name like Quintana. Sounds like katana, don’t it?
        Too bad Vos ain’t racing. She could kick Cav and Zoom in the privates! And don’t start the hormone jokes. Oops, too late.

  4. Patrick O'Brien Says:

    Maybe Holm will lay down the law. “There isn’t anything wrong with the fucking bike. You just got your ass handed to you in a sack. Better get your shit together, cause Mike S. is making noises about you bad mouthing the bikes. “

  5. Dale Says:

    Before everyone gets their panties in a bunch, this quote from Cyclingnews – “I was just beaten today, yeah, that was it,” Cavendish said. “We gave everything we could. The team did everything really perfect. We talked about the last stage but I think they were just spot on today. It was a duel between my team and Argos, but, yeah eventually he was just faster than me, simple as. You can sit and analyse it but if someone’s just simply faster, there’s nothing you can do.”

    • Steve O Says:

      I like Cav. I really do. He’s an incredible talent, and IMHO, he balances 5% temper tantrums with 95% courtesy to everyone, even when he’s asked the same boring question for millionth time.

      But … having said that …

      You can find a thoughtful, measured, sober reflection like that from him after every outburst. They practically write themselves now.

      • khal spencer Says:

        I have to sympathize with Cav. I’m a chemist, not a bike racer, but those who work with me know that I, shall we say, can get quite emotionally wound up into my work. Sometimes that results in language one would not expect from a sedate, calm, entirely self-composed national laboratory scientist.

        Like fuckin’ A, man, how the hell is one supposed to have the drive to do this shit really well unless you can occasionally unleash a torrent of foul language that drives the management out of the room while properly firing up one’s colleagues?

      • Patrick O'Grady Says:

        Yeah, but K, you’re an Eyetalian. We Gaels, like Cav’, Steve and Patrick, we’re supposed to be ever so much more laid back than you stormy Mediterranean types.

        Of course, Gaelic does have more words for “fuck” than Inuit does for “snow.”

      • Patrick O'Brien Says:

        Yea Khal, what Patrick said! But, aint’ there always a but, my Italian aunt from Chicago was always my favorite aunt as a kid. Why she married a sedate Irish machinist is beyond me.

      • khal spencer Says:

        Eyetalian and Lebanese, to make it even worse…the “Spencer” is for cover from the NSA.

  6. Pat O'Brien Says:

    But what did he say in the bus? I admit that as a sprinter he is one of the best ever. But I can’t support a bad tempered man that yells at other people as his own DS admits is the case this year. And not just on one stage.

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