Channel-surfing

A wet brick can be a terrorist weapon in the wrong hands.
See something, say something!

The “monsoons” appear to be upon us. A bit late, but better that than never.

Look for the Homeless People’s Diversion Channel Surfing Championships live from Albuquerque on ESPN, as there are no other “sports” available to televise.*

Simultaneously, on CNN, watch the 101st Vanborne Division (“The Squealing Beagles”) take target practice on the hapless channel-surfers using “less-lethal munitions,” formerly dubbed “non-lethal munitions,” a.k.a. rubber bullets, beanbag rounds,  IRA recruitment tools, etc.

Survivors will be fished out, charged with domestic terrorism for occupying and/or polluting a waterway, and sentenced to take the “troops” water-skiing.

BUM, bum, BUM, bum. …

“Row, y’bastards!”

* Major League Baseball™ is not a sport. It is a business, like AT&T, Facebook, and the White House.

16 thoughts on “Channel-surfing

      1. Squealing Bagels perhaps. The ones with “Flax” seeds and loose nuts that pop off when they get hot in the toaster.

  1. Major League Baseball is/was our “National Pastime” …. and it’s way past it’s time as entertainment or sport.

    1. First I heard of Wall of Vets was today, in The Guardian.

      One vet who has enjoyed the tender mercies of the 101st Vanborne speaks thusly:

      “They have no tactical cohesion to what they’re doing. Duston and I are vets. We can tell what’s going on with these guys. There was no sort of command. They were running around and they were scared.”

      Oh, good. That’s just what America needs right now. More chickenshits with authority. As another vet notes, they’re “creating the situation that they are saying they have to be there for.” Which is the whole idea in a nutshell.

      1. Looks like they’re brand new, inspired by the Wall of Moms.

        I’ll say it again … take me back to 2010, and tell me in ten years the GOP will have West Point and Annapolis grads and veterans groups rising up against them, and inspiring new vets groups to form up and take to the streets, and i’d have asked you to pass the blunt this way. Blue is the new olive drab?

      2. It’s an interesting development, for sure. Remember Vietnam Vets Against the War? And now we got people pulling tour after tour after tour over in the devil’s sandbox, where the ol’ “democracy” continues to prove elusive.

        I expect a little first-hand experience with authoritarian regimes might help some folks decide, “Naw, don’t want that shit here in Peoria. What say we make America safe for democracy first?”

        1. People are malleable.

          My dad was in VVAW. And he campaigned for Shirley Chisholm back in the day. Flash forward, just found out he has $100/year on auto-pay for an at-RonaldReagan-dot-org email address no one remembers him ever using.

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