April Fool’s Day is for the birds

Miss Mia is on the lookout for April fools.
Either that or birds building a nest on our roof.

April Fool’s Day has been consigned to the rear-view mirror, so it’s safe to navigate the Innertubes again.

Like St. Patrick’s Day, April Fool’s Day is for amateurs. Pros do their drinking and fooling year-round without regard for the calendar. Some of the marketing ploys soiling my in-box yesterday were weaker than watery green beer filtered through the kidneys.

I had no time for foolery yesterday. There were menus to devise, groceries to be purchased, bread to bake. Also, Herself’s CR-V required some attention from the Honda grease monkeys down on Lomas; this required me to engage with Albuquerque traffic, which is thick with fools year-round.

Why anyone would buy a new car in this burg remains a mystery to me. You might as well haul a sledgehammer down to the dealership and give your new ride a couple stout whacks before you roll off the lot, get used to the idea of driving a dentmobile like everyone else.

While parked at the curb in my own ratty beater I took a squint at this blog and saw that — in the mobile version, anyway — it remained buggered by WordPress and its filthy Gutenberg block editor, foisted upon the unsuspecting customer base by knaves, cutpurses, and coders who cannot be adjusted by sledgehammer, more’s the pity. So once I got back to El Rancho Pendejo I had to dive into the Classic editor and replace the text and image in the “Playing with blocks” post.

And all of this on a beautiful spring day, too. High in the 60s. Instead of a long bike ride I had to content myself with a 45-minute hike-slash-jog, which come to think of it was not half bad.

And that’s no foolin’.

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13 Responses to “April Fool’s Day is for the birds”

  1. khal spencer Says:

    I had planned on a goof yesterday but was too busy. Taught a class at 0815 (that must be God’s punishment for something I did), three classified meetings, a bunch of papers to review, and I had my second covid shot the day before. I got home after a ten hour day and could barely stand up. Ate some food and crashed and burned. I guess I was the fool.

    Oh, speaking of April first, my finest memory of April Fools Day is still that wonderful 2004 Velo News piece about the great sunflower conspiracy. That is one for the ages.

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      Whoa, Skeeter, that sounds way too much like work. I break out in hives just thinking about it.

      And yeah, that VN AF piece was a keeper. I liked the one where VN fired me, too. More than a few readers were disappointed to find out we was only funnin’.

      • khal spencer Says:

        Do you know if those VN pieces are stashed somewhere? I took a quick look and came up bupkis.

      • Patrick O'Grady Says:

        Man, there is no telling. The outfit has been bought and sold a couple of times since then, moved physically a time or two, and the website reworked over and over and over again. I imagine all manner of stuff went walkabout over the years. They lost a bunch of my cartoons back when I was still dumb enough to send them the originals. Thank Cthulhu for flatbed scanners and the Innertubes. The originals stay home now; only the copies travel.

        • Late update: Found it. You just have to know which cobbles to turn over.

      • Shawn Says:

        Regarding that journal that used to be pretty good, my opinion still stands:

        1/28/12

        Dear VeloNews:

        As much as I have enjoyed your coverage over the many years I have been reading both your subscription hardcopy magazine and online edition, and as much as I have enjoyed reading the articles, journals and updates from the great writers some of whom you have chosen to dispose of, I have removed your online periodical from my favorites list and will no longer continue to routinely read your magazine.

        I can no longer accept the irritating format of your online periodical and the ridiculous inundation of advertisements that whomever your current owner mega-media conglomeration now decides is reasonable. Many years prior to the introduction of your online edition I was a subscription holder, and in recent years I attempted to obtain a marketing free hardcopy subscription (one that didn’t include mass-mailings from every clown and exterminator salesman), with little success.

        I’m not sure of the tea leaves that you are reading regarding the guidance and direction of your periodical, but you may wish to analyze where your bike roots lie and re-address the success of your early growth.

        Good luck in saving yourself from the death throes of the media monster that has absorbed you.

        Sincerely and with hope for better journalism for all of us in the future,

        Shawn Stratton
        Reader since 1981

        PRIVACY NOTICE: THIS MESSAGE IS FOR COMMUNICATION PURPOSE ONLY. NO DIRECT OR INDIRECT MARKETING OF THE SOURCE EMAIL ADDRESS IS ALLOWED, AND NO COMMUNICATION OTHER THAN IN DIRECT REPLY TO THIS MESSAGE IS ALLOWED. VIOLATION OF THIS NOTICE WILL RESULT IN SUITABLE MULTI-COMPENSATORY LITIGATION AND LOTS OF BEER FOR ME AND MY 69 DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDREL ATTORNEYS.

        • Patrick O'Grady Says:

          There are still a couple good people there from Way Back When®: Andrew Hood and Ben Delaney come to mind. But I quit reading the mag/website after I stopped working for ’em a couple-three editors ago. I quit bike racing in 2004 and don’t really care about it anymore, though it paid the bills for a lot of years.

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