Hey, what did you expect? If today were a “Friends” episode, it would be titled, “The One Where We Tortured People and Lied About It.” But it’s day six of Zappadan 2014, and Charles P. Pierce is all the friend you’re ever gonna need for the bird’s-eye lowdown on this torture caper.
Tag: Frank Zappa
A world of secret hungers
In “honor” of the re-emergence of Darth Cheney and his meat puppet from the Death Star, in order to make the case for American Exceptionalism In Torture, we present FZ performing “Brown Shoes Don’t Make It,” live from Munich, just in time for day five of Zappadan 2014.
He used to cut the grass
I used to cut the grass. I should do it again today. But I’d rather take a nice bike ride, maybe dwindle off into the twilight realm of my own secret thoughts. It’s day four of Zappadan 2014, and I don’t know any nice songs for cutting the grass.
Except for this one. And no, I won’t turn it down. I’m not a very nice boy.
Can without Spam
After yesterday’s launch was scrubbed, Orion finally got it up today, so I thought I’d post this horn-fueled version of “Stairway to Heaven” from FZ and the gang on this, the second day of Zappadan 2014.
When I was a squirt and sci-fi nerd, I watched as many launches as I could get away with. The old man was pretty liberal about that sort of self-education, bringing home plenty of autographed pix of Mercury, Gemini and Apollo astronauts, and it was one of the things I really liked about growing up in an Air Force household.
I’ve always wondered how much further we might be along today had we spent a little less time blowing stuff up and a little more sending it up. Instead of contemplating a few unmanned laps around the Earth and moon, which is slightly old hat, we’d have had at least one Starbucks on Mars by now, on Podkayne Fries Boulevard, and a share apiece in Venus Corporation.
Some Zappantani for breakfast
This just in: Marco Pantani is still dead. So is Frank Zappa, but nobody killed him, not even the Mafia, Darren Wilson or Daniel Pantaleo.
That’s right, kiddies, it’s Round One of Zappadan, also known as BummerNacht, the anniversary of FZ’s departure to The Big Studio In the Sky. But don’t freak out, working yourself into an imaginary frenzy — he shall rise again on Zero Day, December 21, the anniversary of his birth.
So whip up a tasty platter of hot rats in lumpy gravy, ring up Uncle Meat and the Grand Wazoo, and go cruising with Ruben and the Jets. But first clean up that cosmik debris (it’ll cure your asthma, too). Now, everybody sing along: “Look, here, NASA … who you jivin’ with that cosmik debris?”
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