One flu over the cuckoo’s nest

Tomorrow I will have had this friggin’ bug for a week and I can tell you the sonofabitch has most definitely overstayed its welcome.

I have launched two tureens of chicken noodle soup against the invader (“From hell’s heart I stab at thee; for hate’s sake I spit my last breath at thee.”) and yet it remains encamped upon my ribcage, brazenly flying its yellow-and-green Kleenex banners. Ptui.

Tomorrow I’m escalating to Scotch broth with kale. And after that, the B-52s.

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22 Responses to “One flu over the cuckoo’s nest”

  1. Ryan Surface Says:

    I say skip the scotch broth and go straight to Scotch!

  2. Larry T. Says:

    Nasty stuff this flu. I had a bad one a few years back and swore I’d get the vaccine every year. So far, so good but I’m certainly rolling the dice getting on a transatlantic flight next week, one with stops in Chicago and NYC along the way…hope they mixed up the right virus combinations in the vaccine! Get well soon Patrick!

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      Thank you, sir. And you have yourself a safe trip back to where tattooed loonies aren’t threatening to start killing people because … because … well, freedom!

      • Larry T. Says:

        Grazie. These gun nuts mystify me…are their genitals really that small? Every time I’ve come across one of them they impress me by how wimpy they seem…as if the big gun somehow compensates for what they view as less-than-standard between their legs? But when Viagra and testosterone gels are marketed on TV like suntan lotion, what do we expect? You know what my wife says….can’t wait to get outta here…only a few more days. Anyone who wants to visit us in Sicily/Siracusa/Ortigia let me know…we’ll figure something out for you.

      • khal spencer Says:

        That Yeager video makes me worry as much about the First Amendment as the Second.

      • Steve O Says:

        I’ve been pointing out that the Second Amendment and Christianity are incompatible. Usually takes about 1.3 seconds to get called a commie.

      • khal spencer Says:

        True to some degree but not sure how that “Give Unto Caesar” stuff works vs turning the other cheek. I once told an NRA volunteer asking me to write a check for Strom Thurmond’s re-election that I would turn my other cheek and he could kiss that one too, but not sure he got the meaning.

        Meanwhile, I don’t know about O’Grady, but its becoming harder and harder to come out of the closet as a gun owner given that the debate has gone from irrational to insane. O’G mentioned melting down his arsenal. Mine is mostly in Upstate NY, but my ancestors from Sicily might object and reappear as ghosts should the luparas (not sawn off, since the Feds are reading) be turned into bicycle tubing.

        At any rate, we need a new organization of hunters and sport shooters who agree the NRA has gone off the rails: GOWANDI: Gun Owners Who Are Not Damned Insane. James Yeager and Wayne LaPierre need not apply.

      • khal spencer Says:

        You want loonies?
        in today’s NY Times article “Makers of Violent Video Games Marshal Support to Fend Off Regulation”

        “…Representative Kevin Brady, a Texas Republican, suggested that the focus on violent video games is misplaced. He called the games “a healthy form of education and entertainment for our family” …”

        For example.

        I think the country has simply lost its marbles.

      • khal spencer Says:

        Not to leave out Call of Duty

      • Steve O Says:

        I love the slogan “there’s a little soldier in everyone.”

        Sorry for taking that personally, but sitting on mom’s couch in your peejays working a joystick in front of a red bull and delivered pizza aint soldiering.

  3. Flahute Says:

    My great grandmother, who as a good Southern Baptist woman never drank a drop of liquor in her life, had a recipe for her medicine, which she took at the first sign of getting sick.

    And of course, since it was medicine, it was given to the chirruns when we got sick as well.

    Hot black tea
    Jack Daniels Tennessee sour mash
    Lemon
    Honey

    I don’t know if it actually helped cure any illnesses, but it sure made you not care.

    Feel better, man. And don’t forget to register for the Crusher in the Tushar.

    http://www.tusharcrusher.com

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      I’ve been using that recipe sans the Tennessee sidewalk-softener on the assumption that my carcass probably contains enough residual ethanol to ping the Breathalyzer even after a week off the sauce.

  4. Boz Says:

    It would be interesting to see how many are getting sick even if they had their flu shot. I had mine, so far, so good. With the amount of sick people I encounter daily on my route, it’s hard to believe the crud has reached the Fortress of Bozitude. Plus, we have the snot-nosed grand kids here regularly. Double danger!

  5. Harry Says:

    Boz, I that it’ll be interesting to see how effective this season’s vaccine is, but flu vaccine effectiveness is a complex beast. Vaccine effectiveness is dependent on a bunch of factors, including how “good” the vaccine is at immunizing people, how closely the strains in the vaccine match what’s circulating, how many people get exposed to the circulating strains, and how many people get vaccinated. Good, honest people are studying this, but it’s not easy – stay tuned for results as the season unfolds.

    This year’s flu vaccine is fairly effective against the strains it contains, including the A/H3N2 subtype that is currently the predominant circulating strain. However, there are other strains out there, including a B strain that is different from what’s covered by the vaccines. A couple of companies have recently gotten approval for flu vaccine formulations that contain 4 strains (2 A’s and 2 B’s), in place of the current 3 strains (2 A’s and 1 B); it will be interesting to see if they are more helpful in preventing disease.

    There is also a bunch of non-flu viruses circulating, which aren’t covered by this (or any) vaccine. Plus, there is a nasty GI bug (a norovirus) that is making the rounds…

    ‘Tis the season, or something like that.

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      I’ve read of some folks getting sick despite vaccinations, and if memory serves the B stain gets the blame. I’ve also heard that the vaccine is less effective for us geezers.

      Me, I just hate getting the needle. You grew up with military medicine, you’d hate it too. Those GI nurses stick you like they enjoy it. Bayonet practice or something.

      And yeah, the norovirus going round sounds like all kinds of no fun at once. So far (knock on wood) I’ve been spared the dread Two Exits, No Waiting. Wash your hands, kiddies.

      • Pat O'Brien Says:

        Wow, you got the Mike Tyson of flu. Watch your ears don’t fall off. In the Army overseas in ’70, I watched the guy in front of me get the flu shot, fairly new stuff back then, and then go into shock. I was reluctant to be next, begged off by pretending to be faint, and did not go back. By the time I came back to the rear again, they had forgotten about my shot. Get better soon. Drown that shit in lemon/lime gatorade.

      • Steve O Says:

        My dad was medical service corps, always running the post hospital. Got my pre-commissioning physical at Walter Reed, 1983. The “doc” weighed 300 pounds and was smoking at his desk when I walked in. At a very naive 18, I knew that wasn’t right.

  6. Debby Says:

    For me flu shots mean I get sick for several days with flu-like symptoms. Then I get the flu anyway. So I don’t do the shots any more. So far this season I’ve been attacked by a couple of cold viruses and a stomach bug, but it hasn’t been too bad (knocking on wood). Lots of hand washing…

  7. hurbenb Says:

    You just want to HTFU!

    During basics I presented an arm & the medic was far too busy talking to another officer about how his kids party went to focus on me.

    Once she’d missed the vein for the 6th time I finally said ‘Ow!”

    Where upon she said, HTFU & nailed the vein in one shot.

    Awesome woman.

  8. Steve O Says:

    Yikes!

    http://exp.lore.com/post/40257773321/mapping-the-progression-of-seasonal-flu-data

    I’m no epidemiologist, but that looks fast moving to me.

  9. Libby Says:

    Sorry to hear about everyone’s illnesses. Please get well soon.
    Apropos vaccines, I just had the DPT vaccine yesterday at my Dr.’s urging and my arm is killing me tonight. Like a painful and very heavy feeling spasm making it difficult to raise my arm or extend it or put weight on it. I’m just really surprised at my body’s response.

  10. Jon Paulos Says:

    I’m taking the suggestion of Gail Collins in today’s New York Times. The intensity of the flu epidemic? It’s all John Boehner’s fault.

    I got my shot in November. I used to forget some years, until I got it about 15 years ago. After that excursion (from “feel like dying” to “feel dead” to “not sure if I’m alive or not” to “who am I again?”) I swore I’d never miss it again.

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