Be Worst

Remember, kids, cutting and pasting other people’s work
is for bloggers only.

From Steve Benen at the Maddow Blog:

• Melania Trump’s “Be Best” blather was apparently another cut-and-paste job, liberating the content of a document released by the previous administration’s Federal Trade Commission in 2014. The writing, it is hard. I know, believe me, I know.

• While Ms. Trump was Being Best, her husband and his pals were being the other thing. Jeffy Bob Jimmie Joe Sessions plans to separate immigrant parents and children because, you know, “the best people,” etc., et al., and so on and so forth. The Big Orange Cheese, meanwhile, wants to slash more than $15 billion in previously approved spending, more than half of it to come from the Children’s Health Insurance Program, because children can’t vote, buy real estate, or suck a golf ball through a garden hose.

• And finally, according to The New Yorker, Eric T. Schneiderman has resigned as New York attorney general to spend more time with his family and work on a memoir entitled, “Shut the Fuck Up And Get Me Another Drink, You Whore (Before I Slap You Again).”

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23 Responses to “Be Worst”

  1. Pat O'Brien Says:

    This slow motion train wreck continues, and at some point I will need a bathroom break. I am truly full of bullshit at this point in this horror story. But I am waiting for the storm that Ms. Clifford says is coming to hit this entitled shit bird right where it hurts, his ego. Too bad she can’t make him poor as well. But, then, maybe he already is poor as Michele Wolf says.

    I guess Melania’s first language isn’t English. To be fair, she is fluent in multiple languages while I have trouble in my native tongue. And, I know everyone hates the on line self appointed grammar cop, but “be best?” Are you kidding me? Which marketing genius came up with that bullshit? I wish George Carlin was around to riff on that crap for 30 minutes or so.

    Eric? Hypocrisy thrives today. Role playing? He better hire Rudy quick.

    • Dale Says:

      I doubt that Melania wrote either the speech or the pamphlet that she is accused of borrowing. Most likely the writer was a WH lackey who has more ambition than brains.

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      The thing that irks me is the sheer sloppiness of the job. Any self-respecting fourth-grader assembling a last-minute essay would do a better job of filing the serial numbers off someone else’s work. We must have standards.

  2. Charley Auer Says:

    Patrick, you will never reach the big time writing this kind of stuff, no matter how truthful!

  3. khal spencer Says:

    And this just in. El Presidente just punted the U.S.-Iran Nuclear Deal. It just keeps getting better.

    I had to laugh at Eric Schneiderman being outed as a serial abuser after all of his grandstanding on Making America Safe From Gun Violence. I thought it was people like me who were recovered rednecks trying to escape backsliding into that Basket of Deplorables. Welcome to the basket, Eric. Pull up a chair and have another drink. But one caveat: if you slap up anyone in this basket, they are liable to pull out their 9 mm hole punching machine and give you a little whiff of Old Fashioned Summary Judgement.

    Its so comforting to know that we are all deplorables under the skin…

    • Pat O'Brien Says:

      It was his grandstanding on the #MeToo movement that I found the most distasteful. I am not a violent person. But, me thinks Eric could use a good ass whuppin’, preferably by a woman.

      • khal spencer Says:

        Its the hypocrisy that galls me. Domestic violence is one of those things that are rightfully used to suggest we need ERPOs, background checks, etc, and here is this highly progressive, politically correct guy who would pass any test. But he is allegedly beating the crap out of his girlfriends and then threatening them by saying he is AG.

        Yeah, we need less violence but in this case, he needs a good ass-whuppin. Where is Wonder Woman when you need her?

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      Herself was very disappointed in Slappy. She thought he was one of the good guys. But then she likes me, too, so her judgment leaves much to be desired.

      • khal spencer Says:

        Slappy’s fall from grace was the topic on the home front and in the car pool today. Sure did surprise me, after the way he went after Harvey “Casting Couch” Weinstein with an axe.

  4. Mile High Devs Says:

    I would gloat about Melania … but then someone would point out that I’ve stolen “resist much | obey little” like a thousand times

  5. Patrick O'Grady Says:

    Dammit, I missed an opportunity to be filthy. The hed should have read “Be wurst.” Now I’m one behind. Again.

  6. JD Dallager Says:

    Back to previous post on newspapers and journalism. Looks like our neighbors down south in Pueblo, CO are about to have their newspaper acquired by Gatehouse.

    • Pat O'Brien Says:

      “GateHouse looks forward to leveraging our national resources to support the community that will enhance quality of life and help create a stronger community,” Taylor said.

      When a hedge fund says they are going to leverage something, the pink slips are coming.

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      Yep. Hal pinged me about that late last night. Think the buyout of that Boulder-based journal of competitive cycling, but on a grander scale. You will recall how that worked out. These guys even do events, too.

      You can read more about Gatehouse here and here. The local spin can be found here.

      Meanwhile, as I said to Hal, “You know what happens after the ring goes on the ol’ finger, right? Off come the knickers and before you can say “hedge fund” your ankles are behind your ears while the headboard starts denting the drywall in the honeymoon suite at the Ben Dover Inn & Suites. Humpita thumpita bumpita, etc., et al., and so on and so forth. Preparest thou for the Exodus.”

  7. larryatcycleitalia Says:

    Gawd how glad I am not to be in the USA at present! I have to go out of my way to learn about crap like this. I wondered why they didn’t put poor Mrs. Trump’s teleprompter in a place she could read it while looking towards the TV cameras?

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      Hey, Larry … how’s the riding and eating coming along? I were you, I’d stay right where you are and have anything left Stateside shipped or sold. I’m not even sure this place is a fixer-upper anymore. It might need to be condemned and razed.

      • larryatcycleitalia Says:

        To tell the truth, I’ve been testing the Italian healthcare system the past few days. Sunday morning I thought I had a bad appendix so off to the emergency room we taxied. (quicker than an ambulance and cheap to boot!) where they admitted me within 15 minutes, took some blood and hooked me up to some pain killers. Felt better as I waited for blood tests (this on Sunday) to come back around 5 PM. No elevated white cell count and pain was gone so they cut me loose.
        Felt good enough the next day for a bike ride but yesterday I was back at “Pronto Soccorso” with the same pain. They doped me up again and shoved me into a CAT scanner where they saw a 7 mm kidney stone making it’s way out towards my bladder. No way to blast it outta there based on its location so a bag full of various drugs was picked up from the all-night pharmacy ($30 for the works!) and I’m back at home doped up (a little) to ease the pain while I drink lots of water, watch the Giro on TV and wait for the thing to descend.
        Hoping to feel well enough tomorrow to drive (not ride) up to see the Etna stage of the Giro…but who knows?
        Overall, the Italian healthcare system gets high marks from yours truly – and other than paying the pharmacy, we’ve not been asked for a dime. And we have ex-pat insurance that would easily pay!

      • Patrick O'Grady Says:

        Yow! Herself had a stone once and says she never wants another, thanks just the same. The late Mister Boo specialized in bladder stones and he was likewise not a fan.

        Drink lots of water, eat plenty drugs, and enjoy the Giro. And keep us posted.

        Also, well done on the taxi. Remember your Richard Pryor, riffing on getting shot: “Call me a cab. I ain’t gon’ bleed to death waitin’ on no ambulance.”

        • larryatcycleitalia Says:

          This I wouldn’t wish on Orange Hitler (well, maybe) and I blame it on my US doc. I was taking potassium citrate supplements (cost a fortune in the US, but next-to-nothing here in Italy) and had no issues for many years after the first stones, but he insisted on reducing the dosage – and here I am now with another stone. $%^&*()@#$%!

      • Pat O'Brien Says:

        I believe liberal amounts of Moretti La Rossa. That will flush out the old pipes. And, it might relieve a little pain.
        Seriously, I hope you take a good piss in the morning and see that bad boy in the bottom of the bowl where it belongs.

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