Stumble To Work Day

Java stop

The point of getting out of bed in the morning.

It’s Bike To Work Day here in Colorado, but it seemed silly to go out to the garage to fetch a bike for the 27-step slog from bed to coffeemaker to iMac. So I walked instead. Sorry ’bout that.

I don’t see a word about BTWD on either of the websites attached to the newspapers that grace our fair community, surprise, surprise. In fairness, there are other stories to be covered, like the Supremes wiping their black-robed asses with the Voting Rights Act, Fort Cartoon losing a brigade and our summer-tourism piggy bank roasting on a very big spit.

Still, if more of us were encouraged to cycle to work instead of firing up the family battlewagon, maybe we would be less inclined to build our homes 30 miles from the cube farm, up in Yahweh’s kindling pile.

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18 Responses to “Stumble To Work Day”

  1. khal spencer Says:

    I’m pretty jaded on bike to work day stuff. Its more like “Motorist Ride Your Bike To Work Day”. BFD–ride one day of the year in return for some swag and a pat on the ass from a politician.

    As you say, if people designed their lives around reasonable biking distances (or bike/train, etc), there would be fewer exurbs burning to the ground and fewer tons of CO2 entering the atmosphere to help nudge on that warmer, dryer climate in the Southwest that is turning our forests into giant bed and breakfasts for bark beetles.

    Speaking of which, I think there are two states that will soon be the market centers for charcoal: Colorado and New Mexico.

    • Patrick O'Brien Says:

      There is a coal fired power plant in the San Pedro river valley. We have seen a haze covering the valley for years. The Cochise County Board of Supervisors looked into the bad air a few years ago, and they concluded they didn’t know what it was and that it probably came from Mexico. Then silence for over 2 years. Now we have a headline in the local pulpwood waster that the plant is going to switch one generator to natural gas as more cost effective that the EPA’s recommendation that they clean up their act. Wanna bet the air cleans up around here soon?

    • John Says:

      Whoa, Khal, I think you’re forgetting what is means to be an American. Assuaging guilt for irresponsible, counter-productive, and destructive behavior by doing the right thing for a few hours a year is what we’re all about. One day of riding a bike to work (or just half a day if you can get a ride home) more than makes up for the all the other days of driving everywhere, including those two blocks to the corner quicky-mart.

      But BTWD is just a minor example, why just look at all the other holidays. Think of those veterans on Memorial Day, then underfund their health care the rest of the time. Give thanks for what you have on Thanksgiving, then go out and fight for more crap the next day.

      And then there’s the biggy, Christmas. Watch one of the many versions of A Christmas Carol to celebrate the season, then go out and buy crappy gifts made in Chinese sweat shops that would make a Victorian capitalist teary-eyed with envy.

      In fact, the only holiday I can think of that we even come remotely close to celebrating year round would be the 4th of July. Nothing makes one prouder than to chant “USA, USA” while filling up at the gas station and sending troops off to fight for more dino-juice.

      Ah, America.

      • Patrick O'Brien Says:

        Yea, John. Don’t forget all those bumper sticker “patriots” that fly those cheap plastic American flags, probably made in China and bought at wally world, from their car windows. You know, the ones that us riders sometimes pick up from the dirt on the side of the road. Then we have the athletes and the celebrity that think the flag is a cape or coat to wear while prancing around after whatever silly shit they did put them in the light for their 15 minutes. But, if it makes me look good then I am good. You know, like people that talk and bitch about politics but don’t vote. You know, the ones that give Congress a 14% approval rating and then re-elect the assholes at an 80% plus rate. Shit, I am wound up tighter than a gnat’s ass stretched over a rain barrel (there it is again Patrick.) Oh well, time to wash this bile down with a Noble Pils.

      • John Says:

        “I am fully committed to supporting the troops to the full extent of the temporary magnetic sticker adhering to the back of my Hummer! And I will continue to support the troops and various other causes just so long as it doesn’t blemish the paint on my car and decrease its resale value!”

        Yep, know ’em well,

      • khal spencer Says:

        We are definitely on a righteous roll here.

      • Patrick O'Brien Says:

        You ain’t kidding Khal. Don’t it feel good to vent? The jerks at the local Home Depot thought it was a good marketing idea to put little American flags in the potted plants. Love watching people watering them and getting the flags muddy. I talked to the manager and reminded him that putting flags in the mud in a military town wasn’t a good idea. Did things change? No. Respect for the country has turned into a slogan. Is it because the government no longer has our respect?

      • khal spencer Says:

        I don’t think anyone takes the country seriously any more. Unless, of course, your ass is on the line in some rathole corner of the universe like Spaminacanistan (POG, pat. pending).

      • Patrick O'Brien Says:

        I do wonder sometimes, Khal. On a brighter note, I just washed and waxed the van and watered the bushes out front. That is almost guaranteed to make it rain. It’s so hot here, I saw a fire hydrant chasing a dog.

      • khal spencer Says:

        I just got back from a run down to Albuquerque. At 11 a.m. it was 99 degrees. Another record breaker, I suspect. And the Rio Grande ain’t so grande these days. More like a trickle of piss behind a busy bar.

  2. Patrick O'Brien Says:

    The supremes passed the voting rights hot potato back to the legislative branch as a fixer upper. Now that’s funny right there. Hey Congress, do your job. Yea, right.

    Then the the robes struck down the DOMA as unconstitutional. Bet some inbred family in Kansas has having a hissy fit right now.

    By the by, last edition of the “Political Junkie” segment on TOTN is on today. Neil Conan’s last show is tomorrow. I will miss it.

  3. Derek Lenahan Says:

    Not for nothing but the Indy did have ads for the past couple of weeks. I will ride my bike around the block on the way in this morning to make up for your lack of participation in such an important bicycle centered event. I will hit the bank on Columbia road twice as well because I hit it pretty much every morning when I ride in.

  4. weaksides (@weaksides) Says:

    Well I average 3-4 days a week bike commuting year-round. Where’s my goddamn medal?

  5. John Says:

    Change of subject, but this may interest more an a few here, and it could be good if it lasts. The NY Times has an on-line interactive cycling map of the whole country in which those with local knowledge post about the good, the bad, and the neutral spots: http://www.nytimes.com/newsgraphics/2013/06/07/bicycle-routes/index.html#city=denver (That link starts you out in Denver but you can pan and zoom wherever you want to go.)

    If it sticks around for a while and gathers enough comments about places other than NYC, this could be helpful. Not as good as a local cycling map but better than nothing.

    • khal spencer Says:

      Thanks, John

      I just left a comment about nukeville.

    • Patrick O'Brien Says:

      I also added a comment about state highway 90 from Sierra Vista to I-10. Thirty three miles of rollers with 7 foot shoulders or bike lane all the way except for 1/2 mile through Huachuca City which is four lanes and little traffic. Nice ride.

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