Patriot games

The tinfoil-Stetson assclowns in my old stomping grounds of Weirdcliffe are taking a beating in the lib’rul media today over plans by the Southern Colorado Patriots Club to march with unloaded firearms in the annual Fourth of July parade.

The local paper, Jim Little’s Wet Mountain Tribune, has a piece from the firing line, as it were. Seems a ruckus ensued when the “patriots” promised that “as many as 500 marchers, bearing firearms, would be marching in the parade as a show of support for 2nd Amendment rights.”

Ho, ho. I hope they plan on busing a few of these nimrods in. The 2010 Census found only 568 persons total living in Weirdcliffe, with 4,205 in the entirety of Crusty County.

Don’t expect Obamacare to provide you with free oxygen tanks for the hike, peckerwoods. Look to the Invisible Hand of the Free Market to prop you up while you’re lugging that 8-pound AK-47 around in the summer sun at 7,888 feet.

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8 Responses to “Patriot games”

  1. Patrick O'Brien Says:

    A rambo wannabe made the news in Tucson for riding the bus with his uncased AR-15 variant riding with him. Folks took cell phone pix of him on the bus and sent them to the local media. It is not unusual to see people here carrying handguns in the open when shopping; we saw a couple at the farmer’s market yesterday packing the heat. Guess things are more dangerous out there then I thought. The world is just leaving my moderate ass behind.

    • Patrick O'Grady Says:

      Patrick, it’s been that way for quite a spell. I remember being mildly surprised when I landed a job at The Arizona Daily Star and walked into a diner for breakfast to see a line of handguns riding hips at the counter. Sometime later I saw an outlaw motorcyclist booming down the highway at speed with some class of semi-automatic rifle slung across his back.

      Not long ago I was in a Bibleburg King Soopers and standing behind some Second Amendment sort with the stereotypical Glock at his side. Never know when a carrot is liable to jump out at you, I suppose.

  2. Patrick O'Brien Says:

    PS: I love that “tinfoil Stetson assclowns.”

  3. khal spencer Says:

    My former neighbor, Roy Bates, lives in Weirdcliffe. I wonder if he will be out there doing the Gun Pride thing. I doubt Roy would ever carry empty though, and he was generally pretty rational politically. Come to think of it, I’m a bit of a gun nut myself. But some of this stuff is just out of a Monty Python episode. Get real, guys.

  4. Larry T. Says:

    I know two nitwits back in Sioux City with permits to carry concealed firearms. Both of these bozos are questionable when it comes to mental stability and according to some of my friends, have pointed these loaded weapons menacingly at more than a few folks. With some of these fools, I think the gun is compensating for something missing elsewhere…and I’m not talking between the ears!

    • khal spencer Says:

      Back in NYS you needed a permit for any handgun. Here in the Wild, Wild, West of New Mexico, you can carry a hand cannon around openly without a permit but need a concealed carry permit to hide it. About the only place I see hand cannons being carried is by the workers in the gun stores–probably to dissuade someone from trying to steal the goodies.

      We certainly have our share of bozos in these parts, but the folks I know up on the Hill who have guns generally tend to be somewhat rational. Probably due to the fact that acting out too badly can cause one to lose one’s clearance and threfore one’s job. Kinda puts the damper on out and out lunacy. Other than the lunacy of nuclear weapons, that is.

      • Patrick O'Brien Says:

        You can carry concealed in AZ without a permit, even though they still issue them if you pass the required classroom and range training course.

      • john Says:

        I demand the right to open-carry a nuclear weapon. Because, you know, freedom.

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