Nobody would call me an undecided voter.
I decided long before Election Day 2016 that I would vote for a thrift-store toaster, a rabid bat, or the empty chair Clint Eastwood was yelling at if any of these items were running against Adolf Twitler. And that remains the case today.
Yet I feel oddly compelled to watch tonight’s “debate,” the way Arthur Denton craved the tender mercies of Orin Scrivello, DDS, in “Little Shop of Horrors.”
I don’t know why. If I were smart, I could always just toddle down to the golf course, catch a couple geezers arguing about which one of them is best equipped to drive the cart into the water hazard. Watch fat Corgis bark at each other on YouTube. Bang my forehead on the keyboard for a while, then check the mirror to see how many new words I’ve invented.
Hyyb! Yuij! Ddfcv!
Alas, as you know, I will never be smart. And after tonight, I am liable to feel even dumberer than usual.
September 29, 2020 at 12:16 pm |
Excellent title.
Maybe this is what happened to the electorate:
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/texas-city-where-boy-6-died-brain-eating-amoeba-will-n1241328
September 29, 2020 at 12:28 pm |
I am with you. The debate has a strange attraction. Will we see Biden destroy dumpster with truth and facts? Will we see dumpster trot out some women who accused Biden of looking up their dresses? I just hope Biden can keep his cool and just taunt the asshole all night and get him acting crazy.
September 29, 2020 at 2:05 pm |
September 29, 2020 at 12:50 pm |
the charitable instinct and the self preservation instinct deflect me from the voyeurism, as well as having no tv.
September 29, 2020 at 1:05 pm |
That’s the smart play. But, you know what Patrick says, and it applies to this Pat as well.
September 29, 2020 at 2:32 pm |
We got TV, but no cable, so the jumping through of various hoops is required.
To be honest, I’m not sure how long I can last. This thing could make Tyson-Holyfield II look like Yul Brynner and Deborah Kerr in “The King and I.”
September 29, 2020 at 4:07 pm |
Ahh. My high school put that play on.
September 29, 2020 at 5:00 pm |
You think dumpster will bite off Biden’s ear?
September 29, 2020 at 5:08 pm |
I think you can stream it live on PBS. That is what we will do. Then, when I get sick of it, I cab go watch “cruisingthecut” Chanel on YouTube and relax a little.
September 29, 2020 at 5:30 pm |
The PBS app on our Apple TV is buggered. I’m gonna have to do an end-around using the Mac Mini. Lord, the trials I endure for FreeDumb®. …
September 29, 2020 at 7:28 pm |
Hey my PBS/Apple hookup isn’t working either. Tried all the usual tricks but nada…
September 29, 2020 at 7:33 pm
Oh and BTW…where the hell was Biggles when you needed him? And where were all the sportsmen who always saw you through? Don’t think I don’t know a good stoner album header reference when I see one Patrick
September 29, 2020 at 1:05 pm |
I’m thinking this will be crudeness vs. civility; empty boastfulness vs. solid knowledge; showmanship vs. substance; narcissism vs. humility; etc. (Unfortunately, for many voters, style wins over substance.)
Also can’t wait to see how Chris Wallace moderates the debate; how the talking heads/experts review the debate; and how the American public reacts/responds to the debate.
September 29, 2020 at 4:13 pm |
Oh, Lord. I forgot that was the Bite Me followed by the General Melee fight.
September 29, 2020 at 7:41 pm |
Well, we lasted just over a half hour. I caved first, but Herself insisted, “Just a few more minutes.”
Good God awmighty. It was worse than I had expected, and my expectations were low, practically subterranean.
September 29, 2020 at 7:57 pm |
Sandy made it ten minutes, I went twenty. It felt so good when I stopped.
September 29, 2020 at 8:52 pm |
By the way, Pat, on another topic, that Terry Ti saddle is working out great! I put 34 miles on it on Monday and my ass was quite happy.
September 30, 2020 at 5:06 am |
Excellent! I have always used Terry saddles, mostly the Liberator model. When they moved Liberator production from Italy to Taiwan, I switched to the Ti Fly, which is still made in Italy. Glad it worked out for you.
September 29, 2020 at 8:47 pm |
I lasted about ten minutes and killed the signal. As my brother Rich said, “What a shit-show!”
September 29, 2020 at 9:52 pm |
It really was worth turning off shortly after it began, and start looking for rabid bats outside, wasn’t it?